MOVE 44 · TIMING & SILENCE · FREE
Don't Fill the Silence
After you make a request or state a price, stay quiet and let the other side respond, rather than rushing in with concessions.
Silence after an ask belongs to the other side; filling it gives away your position.
WHY IT WORKS
Silence is uncomfortable, and people instinctively fill it — often with qualifiers, discounts or retractions. Holding still for a few seconds lets the other person think and respond to your actual proposal, and often prompts them to offer information or acceptance.
WHEN TO USE IT
- You have just stated a price, salary request or condition.
- The other side goes quiet after hearing your proposal.
WHEN NOT TO USE IT
- The silence is caused by confusion and needs clarification.
- In written channels, where silence works differently; follow up appropriately instead.
SIGNALS IT FITS
- You often add 'but we could…' immediately after an ask.
- You feel relief only when the other person speaks.
PREPARATION
- Practise stating a request and counting silently to ten.
- Decide that your next words, if any, will be a question, not a concession.
STEP BY STEP
- Make the request clearly.
- Stop speaking.
- Hold eye contact or stay calmly present for up to ten seconds.
- If needed, ask a question rather than softening the proposal.
OPENING LINE
“Based on everything we've discussed, I'm asking for a 10% increase.”
SCRIPT
I'm asking for a base of 85,000. [Pause.]
LIKELY RESPONSES & COUNTERS
- If they stay silent too
- After ten seconds, ask 'How does that sit with you?' rather than lowering the request.
- If they respond with an objection
- Listen fully, then respond to the objection's substance.
SECOND MOVE
If an objection arrives, use Label the Objection.
FOLLOW-UP
In written settings, follow up after a reasonable period rather than sending immediate clarifications.
COMMON MISTAKES
- Filling silence with self-deprecating jokes.
- Using silence aggressively as a stare-down.
WALK-AWAY CONDITIONS
- Silence is met with repeated attempts to make you retract the request without discussion.
EXAMPLE (FICTIONAL)
A nurse requesting a schedule change stated her ask and waited. After a long pause, her manager said 'I think we can do Tuesdays' — more than she had planned to settle for.
ETHICAL BOUNDARY
Silence should give space, not intimidate. Holding a hostile stare to unsettle someone crosses into pressure.
RELATED MOVES
Content version 1 · Drafted by Power Move IQ Editorial · Not yet human-reviewed · Educational decision support, not legal, financial or employment advice.